Attachment Parenting: Primitive, Peculiar, or Practical?

   "Attachment Parenting" that's the word on the street these days, and it's a weird one. Dr. William Sears, a renowned pediatrician, coined the term and came up with these revolutionary ideas that encourage parents to hold their babies pretty much all the time, feed them when they act hungry, pick  them up when they cry, and sleep near enough to them at night to accomplish these things quickly. I don't know about you, but that sounds pretty eccentric and peculiar to me, and a tad new-fangled.

I think not....

I think you could probably, maybe, classify me as an attachment parent since my baby sleeps in my bed, I carry him around in a sling all the time, feed on demand, and don't let him "cry it out." But the truth is I just do what works, and don't really care that there's a name for it.


For example, "Babywearing" is what attachment parents call this practice of carrying your baby in a sling or some other kind of carrier attached to your person. They say that it creates a stronger bond between parent and child, does something cool with hormones, and ultimately contributes to the development of a healthy, well adjusted child.  That's all well and good good, but that's not why I do it. I don't carry my baby in a neat little wrap to be trendy or because I want to be "earth mom."  Godness no! I don't have time to think that hard. I carry my baby in a neat little wrap thingy because its practical. Sometimes the primitive is practical. Look at this picture. Notice what the mom is doing. She's smiling.  Look at what the baby is doing. He's sleeping.

Then there's breastfeeding, experts say it's the best food for baby, it helps foster a wonderful bond between mother and child, etc. etc. etc.  I agree, but I don't breastfeed to join any kind of parenting movement. I breastfeed because 1. It's the most frugal option, and 2. My baby gets these cool things called antibodies. Of course, there are some moms like the time magazine mom who breastfeed into preschool, but not me. I'm of the persuasion that in a country and circumstance where food is plentiful, if the child can say "boob," he's too old for mine.

Co-Sleeping is a big issue these days too. Some hospitals, like the one I delivered in, even make you sign an agreement that you won't do it, and will grab your baby up in a heartbeat if you happen to fall asleep beside each other. Cities like Milwaukee have even used an advertising campaign with scary photos like this one to curb co-sleeping. opponents argue that its a marriage killer, or at least a passion killer. Proponents say it helps baby learn that sleep is a pleasant state to enter and a fearless state to remain in and that it adds a nighttime touch that helps busy daytime parents reconnect with their infant at night.  I say, it's just practical. It makes sense because most of the time, my baby sleeps better when he's with me. When he sleeps, we all get to sleep So, he does, and safely. As far as passion goes....well.

ahem.....

That's why there's a bassinet near by.

Lastly, some parents, let their babies "cry it out."  Attachment Parents don't. I don't, but it's not because I'm afraid crying it out will be detrimental. It's not because I'm consciously trying to create a well adjusted, independent adult. I'm just doing what comes natural, following my instincts. I don't know, maybe my baby's just weird, but he cries if there's something wrong. If I fix it, he stops. So, when he cries, I try to fix it. Peculiar? maybe. Primitive? perhaps, but Practical? Absolutely.

I guess you could call me an attachment parent, but I don't call it that. I experiment and do whatever happens to work. I call myself eclectic. I call myself practical.

I'm a whatever works mom.